Moonrise

Friday, April 11, 2008

The Bunk Bed Nightmare.....

The Bunk Bed....remember the Bunk Bed?

It isn't. Not yet.....soon. We put the damm thing together bass-ackward to the point where it is now a pile of parts, the full size futon bottom and the top twin are lying side by side in the Cubs room, one Cub having slept on each last night....

Yes, dear Readers, I read....or attempted to read the One Paye Sembly Munule. (Spelling as it reads) Who the Eff translates this crap? Some examples...

There were big black blotches throughout the "manual" that were unreadable. Bigger was in charge of the instructions, as we were having to constantly refer to it during assembly. Nothing made sense to our Round Eye brains...
A few notable quotes…

“Before using this king of machine toos,you must read this direction,in order to have an intimate of structures of structures of the machine tool,and also function…”
“3.please firmly execute the following operting fules:”

“First,you put a steel plate(its sidth echo the demand of the machine…”

“Do not use for the storage of precision machinery, foodstuffs, animals or plants, or artworks.” This on a frigging Bunk Bed?

And on and on and on and then the cussing started....Bigger smacked Lil' Wollfie. Lil' Wollfie retaliated with overwhelming force....surprised no blood flowed.

I ended up dismantling enough to lay the matresses out, and they fell into exhausted sleep....ocassionally cursing each other in their dreams....

Nothing like Sibling Love, Folks.....

So....tonight, Lil' is at the Controllers house, Bigger is with me, we've some movies that he's watching with a girlfriend downstairs, and we'll take up the Mantle of Bunk Bedding again on the morrow.

3 comments:

Foxfier, formerly Sailorette said...

...

I think the way my mom did it was easier...

She used 2x4s and 2x6's to build it from scratch.

Very basic: four supports, two long 2/4s with four 4x1s to brace the mattress for each bed, and after I fell off a few times (never did wake up, despite being on the top bunk.....) she put in two 2x4s to cradle the edges of the top bunk...

Oh, and 3 2x4 on the end to make a way to climb to the top at one end, and two 2x4s for the headpiece at the tops....

cry_alone said...

I thinks thats how our bunk beds were too! lol, oh dear poor wolfie. Come on now.... you tried in this case to rtfm (read the f-ing manual) and it made no sense. its manuals like these that are the reason why most men dont bother w/ them! (sorry getting sterotypical ha ha!) hey, just look at the perdy pictures to build it, i'm sure u guys will get it! if not, build em a bunkbed!it might keep you guys sane-er lol!

Rose said...

I think I had those exact same instructions for the bookcase I had to assemble. Maybe they just xerox 'em off! Some of the translations are hysterical.