Moonrise

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Why Dragn loves to Grocery shop with me........


Just a little trot down memory lane.......

A number of years back I was buying a 2 large bags of Purina dog chow at the local Food store, for my dogs Siddhartha and Steppenwolf. First a Dobie, second a Rott.

I was about to check out when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog. What did she think, that I had an elephant? *Fer crying out loud, I hates me some elephants*

Since I had little else to do, on ADD creative impulse, I told her that no, I didn’t have a dog, and that I was starting the Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn’t because I ended up in the hospital last time.

On the bright side though, I’d lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of every orifice of my body and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry and that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.

(I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was enthralled with my story by now.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food had poisoned me.

I told her no; I had stopped in the middle of the parking lot to lick my butt and a car hit me.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack, he was laughing so hard!

The Grocery Store won’t let me shop there any more. That's why I moved to California........

Heh.
Wollf

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I think I love you!

Mad William Flint said...

Added to the list of reasons I wish I had a dog... Just to set that up.