Moonrise

Friday, January 30, 2009

I Have been married twice.........

And.....in order to quell the rumors.....I shall marry again. Any guesses whom? Right, just as I thought, no one has a clue......sheesh, you Folks are not paying attention.....

And for you doubting Thomas types....yes, I hear you, "Two times divorced, ol' Wollf must be bad at the Marriage thing....what's he thinking?"

I say, "Bah!". I'm actually quite good at being a Husband, Provider, Friend and that "other" thing.....PG-13, remember? I'm getting better at it, and you Know that I've been meditating on it......

You see, my first one.....at 19 lasted twelve years, and gave me two Beautiful Daughters......the second, Twenty Friggin' Years......see, I'm getting better, and how many years do I have left on this Mortal Coil? Thirty....ish?

I'm going for it.....don't try and talk me out of it, unless you want to.....and realise that M'Lady Dragn won't care for it....*laughing*.....

She's gone tonite, and I'm alone at the Lair with Uber, Ransom, Habibi (the Parakeet), and Bob the Fish........so, Really get to write....*phew*...it's a bit difficult when I'm so busy just reveling in the feeling of Her being in my Life....

But, that's not what I came here to talk about tonite....shades of "Alice's Restaurant", which, yes I know ALL the words to, so don't get me started....Dragn made the mistake once.....

Anyways.....M'Lady Dragn, a good Polish Catholic Gurl, and musician Extraordinaire, is off to play drums in a "Praise" band at the local Christian Church......as in Protestant.......*gasp*

I hope she has a wonderful time.....doesn't matter what "flavor" of Believer you are......what matters ...at least to Wollf, is that you follow the "tenets" of what our G-d has Blessed us with.......*yup, another conversation*.......

BUT.....the poor Dear Woman has little experience with Protestant or Evangelical Churches......so.....I gave her a bit of advice from my extensive knowledge......see above , years married....all to "either/or"......

First: The Holy Catholic Church typically has One door to enter and you are "In G-d's House"....the Nave, where the Worship happens.....there's a Fount as you enter filled with Holy Water to prepare yourself and Honor the Father....you know the drill.....don't make me recite.....

Second: In the Protestant Church, there are "typically" TWO" sets of doors.....the first is called the Narthex......not the mud room as you might think, or the Lobby, or any other such secular thing.....

There are often times pamphlets and New Testaments and coffee and donuts for the taking....*Evangelical, remember?*........there is also a.......fountain.....I warned her....

DON'T TOUCH IT!! It's for drinking, of all things, although I have a sneaking suspicion that it's actually a "Catholic Detector"....yes, I did Cross myself once, and trust me, People look at you kinda funny when you do that......

Third: *And this is because she is a Teacher*......during the Worship part of the Service, a few People might raise their hands, and sway them around as if to get your attention.

DO NOT CALL ON THEM!!! They are not wanting to ask a question or request a restroom pass......they are simply feeling the Spirit, and evoking, and Praising our G-d personally....it's the way it's done....oh and....

Fourth: In the same vein, if by chance someone jumps to their feet and shoots their hands upward, eyes to the ceiling........it is NOT the beginning of a Wave like at a sporting event, so try not to yell "Go 'Zona", or "Redwings!!".....it's not like that...........

And then there's this, and finally a bit serious, there "might" be an "Altar Call"...you don't have to go down....you're already a Member of the Eternal Club....

So....that's it for tonight.......Any non-Catholics, please understand the "fun" in which this is meant....the G-d that Wollf Believes in has a Great and Understanding sense of humor........

Don't worry, M'Lady Dragn, after reading this, will probably not leave me alone again.....heh....I feel so much better though, and NO.....no editing, I'll Post and then read this tripe......gotta go.

Probably to Confession.
"Forgive me Father Mike, for I have Written"........

Oh, He'll understand........
May our G-d Bless you all.....
Wollf

Musical Interlude.......

Thursday, January 29, 2009

Had my butt kicked about one too many times.....

As any who have followed this silly Journal/Journey for any time realise, I am now a divorced fellah....didn't want it, didn't ask for it....and am dammnably happy that it was so ordained.......

Took a bit of time......and the special tonic of a certain Dragn, but I am feeling pretty darned good emotionally.....

But.........I came to realise that I, with that darned "Honor" thing of mine, have been allowing myself to be taken advantage of in a dollars and cents way. I've put off....spell avoided....the finalization of the Retirement account and a certain amount of "makeup" money that's owed to me.....

Aww heck, I won't go into it any deeper....just suffice to say that I'm feeling a whole lot like the Kitteh in the picture........


Time to "Git 'er done.....
I am not one to be trifled with.......
Wollf

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Heh.......

I was waiting at the train station this morning, and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump off as a train approached.

So I ran over and said "Stop! Don't do it!" He said "Why shouldn't I?".

I said, "Well, there's so much to live for!" He said, "Like what?"

I said, "Well, are you religious or atheist?" He said, "Religious."

I said, "Me too! …Are you Christian or Buddhist?" He said, "Christian."

I said, "Me too! …Are you Catholic or Protestant?" He said, "Protestant."

I said, "Me too! …Are you Episcopalian or Baptist?" He said, "Baptist!"

I said, "Wow! Me too!…Are you Baptist church of God or Baptist church of the Lord?" He said, "Baptist church of God!"

I said, "Me too! Are you original Baptist church of God, or are you reformed Baptist church of God?" He said, "Reformed Baptist church of God!"

I said, "Me too! Are you reformed Baptist church of God, reformation of 1879, or reformed Baptist church of God, reformation of 1915?"

He said, "Reformed Baptist church of God, reformation of 1915!"

I said, "Die, heretic scum"…and pushed him off.

Wow....a picture of one of my Readers........

Not really.....I hope, otherwise, I'm moving to Brazil....


Nice shirt, huh?
Wollf

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

This sound vaguely familiar?

"Owners of capital will stimulate the working class to buy more and more of expensive goods, houses and technology, pushing them to take more and more expensive credits, until their debt becomes unbearable. The unpaid debt will lead to bankruptcy of banks, which will have to be nationalized, and the State will have to take the road which will eventually lead to communism."

[*Karl Marx*, *1867*, */Das Kapital/*, his doctrine of the theory of surplus value]

Yup.....kinda thought so, and as we know, Those that do not understand history are doomed to repeat it....or something like that.
Wollf

From FOX News......

Remember the Hadron Collider?

Still worried that the Large Hadron Collider will create a black hole that will destroy the Earth when it's finally switched on this summer?

Um, well, you may have a point........

Three physicists have reexamined the math surrounding the creation of microscopic black holes in the Switzerland-based LHC, the world's largest particle collider, and determined that they won't simply evaporate in a millisecond as had previously been predicted.

Rather, Roberto Casadio of the University of Bologna in Italy and Sergio Fabi and Benjamin Harms of the University of Alabama say mini black holes could exist for much longer — perhaps even more than a second, a relative eternity in particle colliders, where most objects decay much faster.

Under such long-lived conditions, it becomes a race between how fast a black hole can decay — and how fast it can gobble up matter to grow bigger and prevent itself from decaying.

Casadio, Fabi and Harms think the black hole would lose out, and pass through the Earth or out of the atmosphere before it got to be a problem.

"We conclude that ... the growth of black holes to catastrophic size does not seem possible. Nonetheless, it remains true that the expected decay times are much longer (and possibly >> 1 second) than is typically predicted by other models," the three state in a brief paper posted at the scientific discussion Web site ArXiv.org.
FoxNews.com can think of a few other things that didn't seem possible once — the theory of continental drift, the fact that rocks fall from the sky, the notion that the Earth revolves around the sun, the idea that scientists could be horribly wrong.

We're also wondering how often the LHC might create individual black holes, since longer-lived ones have a greater chance of merging with each other, and, um, well, see ya.

If the worst comes to pass, and there's now a slightly greater chance that it might, at least it might explain why we've never heard from extraterrestrial civilizations: Maybe they built Large Hadron Colliders of their own.

Problem is....if it does go bad....who's gonna know?
At least we'll finally be done with Pelosi, Reid, Murtha, et al.....

There's always a silver lining.
Wollf

Monday, January 26, 2009

Ouch....OUTCH.....outchie damm OUTCH!!!!

Blogging shall be light this evening.....I usually do this in the early morning with a "hold" for publishing, but I couldn't move my dammnable fingers......

Long story as short as this long winded Wollf can bear.....I sharpened the knives last night....did a darn good job, except for one minor little glitch......

I bought one of those new fangled, hold in your hand, as seen on TV, G-d dammed sharpeners......guaranteed easy......except maybe for the blood, and slicing the bone...

As I earlier said.......Owwwwwwwooooooottcchhh....outch. The dammnable thing slipped, my Ginsu butcher knife did what it is designed to do, although on the wrong sort of meat, and I, yor sensitive author....now have bandage son two of his deeply lacerated left fingers......

To the bone on the middle one....did I say ouch? I felt like such a dummy. Dragn looked up and said, "Ooh, did you you cut yourself Honey?"

I avoided saying that, "No, I actually FILLETED myself, thank you very much....."

When she saw the extent of the damage, she offered that we should go to the Medic.....Wollf does not care for Medics....well, except for the snuggly ones, which Dragn soon proved to be....

She helped with pulling out my E-pack, and after a bit of direct pressure, sprinkled....actually poured the coagulant powder, and the red stuff was stanched. Then, just a matter of gluing it all together, and installing the dressing....

Good as new, except for.....did I say it hurts like Bejeebus, especially when I type?

Ouch.
Wollf

A Request.......

To PWW and DW....the darn thing won't embed, but here's a clicky thingie.
Hippo and Dog

I personally think the Hippo ought to lighten up.......
Wollf

Friday, January 23, 2009

My dream of going back to the Reservation......

It’s late fall and the Indians on a remote reservation in Northern Maine asked their new chief if the coming winter was going to be cold or mild.

Since he was a chief in a modern society, he had never been taught the old secrets.

When he looked at the sky, he couldn’t tell what the winter was going to be like.

Nevertheless, to be on the safe side, he told his tribe that the winter was indeed going to be cold and that the members of the village should collect firewood to be prepared.

But, being a practical leader, after several days, he got an idea. He went to the phone booth, called the National Weather Service and asked, ‘Is the coming winter going to be cold ?’

‘It looks like this winter is going to be quite cold,’ the meteorologist at the weather service responded.

So the chief went back to his people and told them to collect even more firewood in order to be prepared.

A week later, he called the National Weather Service again. ‘Does it still look like it is going to be a very cold winter?’

‘Yes,’ the man at National Weather Service again replied, ‘it’s going to be a very cold winter.’

The chief again went back to his people and ordered them to collect every scrap of firewood they could find.

Two weeks later, the chief called the National Weather Service again. ‘Are you absolutely sure that the winter is going to be very cold?’

‘Absolutely,’ the man replied. ‘It’s looking more and more like it is going to be one of the coldest winters we’ve ever seen.’

‘How can you be so sure?’ the chief asked.

The weatherman replied, ‘The Indians are collecting firewood like crazy.’

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Things that make me say Hmmmmmm?

From The Telegraph, UK, comes this bit of reporting that makes my skin crawl. I remember as a lil'wollf thinking about all the horrible things that the Nazis did to helpless People in their experiments to create their Master Race......

Seems now, that maybe the "Angel of Death" had some sucess after all....it all seems to me both terrifying, inhuman and mesmerizing all at the same time....


The steely hearted "Angel of Death", whose mission was to create a master race fit for the Third Reich, was the resident medic at Auschwitz from May 1943 until his flight in the face of the Red Army advance in January 1945.

His task was to carry out experiments to discover by what method of genetic quirk twins were produced – and then to artificially increase the Aryan birthrate for his master, Adolf Hitler.

Now, a historian claims, Mengele's notorious experiments may have borne fruit.
For years scientists have failed to discover why as many as one in five pregnancies in a small Brazilian town have resulted in twins – most of them blond haired and blue eyed.

But residents of Candido Godoi now claim that Mengele made repeated visits there in the early 1960s, posing at first as a vet but then offering medical treatment to the women of the town.

Shuttling between Argentina, Paraguay and Brazil, he managed to evade justice before his death in 1979, but his dreams of a Nazi master race appeared unfulfilled.
In a new book, Mengele: the Angel of Death in South America, the Argentine historian Jorge Camarasa, a specialist in the post-war Nazi flight to South America, has painstakingly pieced together the Nazi doctor's mysterious later years.

After speaking to the townspeople of Candido Godoi, he is convinced that Mengele continued his genetic experiments with twins – with startling results.
He reveals how, after working with cattle farmers in Argentina to increase their stock, Mengele fled the country after fellow Nazi, Adolf Eichmann, was kidnapped by Israeli agents.

He claims that Mengele found refuge in the German enclave of Colonias Unidas, Paraguay, and from there, in 1963, began to make regular trips to another predominantly German community just over the border in Brazil – the farming community of Candido Godoi.

And, Mr Camaras claims, it was here that soon after the birthrate of twins began to spiral.

"I think Candido Godoi may have been Mengele's laboratory, where he finally managed to fulfil his dreams of creating a master race of blond haired, blue eyed Aryans," he said.
"There is testimony that he attended women, followed their pregnancies, treated them with new types of drugs and preparations, that he talked of artificial insemination in human beings, and that he continued working with animals, proclaiming that he was capable of getting cows to produce male twins."

The urbane German who arrived in Candido Godoi was remembered with fondness by many of the townspeople.

"He told us he was a vet," said Aloisi Finkler, a local farmer interviewed by Mr Camarasa. "He asked about illnesses we had among our animals, and told us not to worry, he could cure them. He appeared a cultured and dignified man."

Another farmer, Leonardo Boufler, said: "He went from farm to farm checking the animals. He checked them for TB, and injected those that were infected. He said he could carry out artificial insemination of cows and humans, which we thought impossible as in those days it was unheard of."

But the Nazi eugenicist did not concentrate on animals alone.

A former mayor and town doctor, Anencia Flores da Silva, set out to try to solve the town's mystery. He interviewed hundreds of people, and discovered one character who crept on cropping up: an itinerant medic calling himself Rudolph Weiss.

Dr da Silva said: "In the testimonies we collected we came across women who were treated by him, he appeared to be some sort of rural medic who went from house to house. He attended women who had varicose veins and gave them a potion which he carried in a bottle, or tablets which he brought with him. Sometimes he carried out dental work, and everyone remembers he used to take blood."

The people of Candido Godoi now largely accept that a Nazi war criminal was an inadvertent guest of theirs for several years in the early 1960s. The town's official crest shows two identical profiles and a road sign welcomes visitors to a "Farming Community and Land of the Twins". There is also a museum, the House of the Twins.

While the twins birthrate varies widely in different countries, it is typically about one in 80 pregnancies – a statistic that has left Mr Camarasa certain in his claim that Mengele was successfully pursuing his dreams of creating a master race, a real-life Boys from Brazil.

"Nobody knows for sure exactly what date Mengele arrived in Candido Godoi, but the first twins were born in 1963, the year in which we first hear reports of his presence," he said.

So now what? The oldest ones are closing in on fifty, and the number/ percent of twins born is staying the same for the population.....further Voluntary testing of the subjects.....or do we just try and let this chapter of both Science and Horror end?

I dunno.....it's way above my head.

And take a closer look at the photo, yes it's from Candido Godoi, and tell me if the younger generations are becoming even more "Blonde"? What the hell did he do? Is it progressive throughout the generations.....

The stuff nightmares and gezenstacks are made of.......
Wollf

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Recognize this young Man?




He's AlonZo Rachel, Christian, Conservative with the "street" voice of Patriotism.

A lot of us have been seeing his Youtube videos on Politics and Patriotism and Morality for quite some time now.....

I just ran into his newest post election "rant" at my fave Foxfier's place over atHEADNOISES

After you watch the video....and You Will Watch The Video.......follow his linky thingie over to his place and enjoy reading about a young Man who has gotten his shi-ite together....maybe even leave a note from whence you came and donate to the Cause.

I'm buying a shirt.....kinda subtle, like yours truly. Here's the video:

And here's the Linky thingie......you've all seen him, now you can get to know him a bit better.....MACHO SAUCE

Wollf...and a second H/T to Foxfier

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

My New Anthem........

But not the National......


The personal ........ check this out and see if you don't agree.


Once you listen and see, and if you agree, as I think you will, put this on your website too.... Born Again American...


gave me tears.... and I don't cry easy



I'll write more about this in the morning.....Thank you, My Dragn for turning me on to this...

Wollf

T'were Wollf to have an Inauguration Speech......

In today's Big Hoo Hah Party.......

"Good morning, fellow Americans. Before taking the Oath of Office, I must say that Our first Order of business, besides protecting the American People from threats both Foreign and Domestic......

Is to get this Country back to Work. To infuse the American economy with the good old fashioned American work ethic.

What are all you People doing here, instead of working? You had the day off Yesterday!!

One to two million Americans on the Mall today just to see me make a Solemn Pledge? What, are you friggin' Nuts? Any of You who are Retired, members of the Press, Congressmen, Senators or a part of the Security Teams may stay.

The rest of You, please make an orderly evacuation of the area and either Get Back to Work, or Apply for a Job or Volunteer your Time to help this situation.

I am not going to buy you a television set, or pay your mortgage or feed your family. That is Your Job. In My view, Hope is not a Path and Change is not a Destination.

I have cancelled my appearance at any and all Inaugural Festivities, including the Balls that seem to be everywhere. I will say the Oath, and go inside, eat a chicken salad sandwich and get to the work of the American People.

Have you noticed that there are Two million of you on The Mall and only Five Thousand toilets? Do the math, People.

Get off my Lawn.
And thank you for your support."

*Insert Oath of Office here*

Wollf

Monday, January 19, 2009

Cleaning out the Pictures........

What are You looking at?

Just trying to clean up my hard drive a bit, but don't want to lose the pictures that make me say, "Hmmmm, or give me a smile".....so you have to duffer my odd taste in ecletic photography......

I don't think this one really needed the inscribed explanation, but.....


And, I suppose this one simply can't be explained.....fans come in all styles, dontcha know.......


A phot of me and my old friend "Red", on the way to a party......


And.....simply one of the oddest Human - Animal interactive photos that I've ever enjoyed.......


There, now my computer is cleaned up, and you have been forced to help me do it. I'm kind of the Tom Sawyer of the inner tube.....
Wollf

Saturday, January 17, 2009

A Rare Weekend Posting.........

.....well, you know, even Wollfs has to rest....BUT.....

We had a BBQ, Hostessed by Miss DammitWoman up in Ventura, and the participants made for lovely company. She, DW, called it the SoCal KisP BBQ....a small number of regular "writer" and "commenter" types were there......

What's KisP?SondraK ...it's a place where "semi" loke minded Conservatives gather to *gasp*, *giggle* and sometimes be *outraged*.......

DW set up a dinner for anyone in the area.....great idea to put faces to names in the comments.....met Forest Hunter, who flew in from Nippan land, The Digital Hairshirt, quite the cutie, and re-enjoyed The Ugly American, who simply isn't, and her baby brother.....who happens to be the proud owner of a set of calves that would make any Pro Defensive Lineman jealous.......

We had a wonderful dinner of Tri-tip, tater salad, garlic bread, "Chili" and tamales. Double yum, and not just cuz I made the chili and did my best not to burn the tri-tip.......

And.....whoa, there Nellie, the ever beautiful .....and "currently" Miss Dragn, accompanied your writer.....People who may have wondered now understand why ol' Wollf is a happy feller......though it created the question, "What the Heck is SHE thinking?".......

We all had a good time, though Dragn and I had to leave early.....my Cubs are with us tonite, dontchaknow.......I hope the festivities go late into the night.

Dammit Woman, thank you for a wonderful time.

Those that can make it.....any friends of this silly a$$ed blog, or others, when you're in SoCal, give a shout out and I'll buy you dinner....it's the least I can do for boring you with my life.....

G,-nite....I have teenage Cubs to oversee, and a certain Dragn to smooch........
Wollf

Friday, January 16, 2009

Peace Symbol......

It just says Peace to me......Fighter Jets doing a smoke circle around barbed wire.

Without Fences and warriors to defend those fences.....Peace is just a feel good thought and not a reality. And youknow I'm based in reality.

Now, agree with me in the comments, or the hawt chick fires her banana ........

Heh
Wollf

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Five Years.........


And it's "easier"........I won't write as I did last year today, if anyone is interested, the full story is HERE

I Love you Baby Girl........

And an aside, to Foxfier.......you were right that it gets to a point, like an old wound where it doesn't hurt so much unless you "poke" it.

Thanks for listening,
Wollf

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

An Anonymous Tale........

I have done some Cowboying in my youth, so at first glance, this feller's idea seemed almost logical....I've changed my mind....

I had this idea that I was going to rope a deer, put it in a stall, feed it up on corn for a couple of weeks, then kill it and eat it.

The first step in this adventure was getting a deer. I figured that, since they congregate at my cattle feeder and do not seem to have much fear of me when we are there (a bold one will sometimes come right up and sniff at the bags of feed while I am in the back of the truck not 4 feet away), it should not be difficult to rope one, get up to it and toss a bag over its head (to calm it down) then hog tie it and transport it home.

I filled the cattle feeder then hid down at the end with my rope.

The cattle, having seen the roping thing before, stayed well back. They were not having any of it.

After about 20 minutes, my deer showed up -- 3 of them. I picked out a likely looking one, stepped out from the end of the feeder, and threw my rope. The deer just stood there and stared at me.

I wrapped the rope around my waist and twisted the end so I would have a good hold. The deer still just stood and stared at me, but you could tell it was mildly concerned about the whole rope situation.

I took a step towards it...it took a step away. I put a little tension on the rope and then received an education.

The first thing that I learned is that, while a deer may just stand there, looking at you funny while you rope it, they are spurred to action when you start pulling on that rope.

That deer EXPLODED.

The second thing I learned is that pound for pound, a deer is a LOT stronger than a cow or a colt. A cow or a colt in that weight range I could fight down with a rope and with some dignity.

A deer--no chance.

That thing ran and bucked and twisted and pulled. There was no controlling it and certainly no getting close to it. As it jerked me off my feet and started dragging me across the ground, it occurred to me that having a deer on a rope was not nearly as good an idea as I had originally imagined.

The only up side is that they do not have as much stamina as many other animals.

A brief 10 minutes later, it was tired and not nearly as quick to jerk me off my feet and drag me when I managed to get up. It took me a few minutes to realize this, since I was mostly blinded by the blood flowing out of the big gash in my head. At that point, I had lost my taste for corn-fed venison.

I just wanted to get that devil creature off the end of that rope.

I figured if I just let it go with the rope hanging around its neck, it would likely die slow and painfully somewhere. At the time, there was no love at all between me and that deer. At that moment, I hated the thing, and I would venture a guess that the feeling was mutual..

Despite the gash in my head and the several large knots where I had cleverly arrested the deer's momentum by bracing my head against various large rocks as it dragged me across the ground, I could still think clearly enough to recognize that there was a small chance that I shared some tiny amount of responsibility for the situation we were in, so I didn't want the deer to have to suffer a slow death, so I managed to get it lined back up in between my truck and the feeder - a little trap I had set before hand...kind of like a squeeze chute.

I got it to back in there and I started moving up so I could get my rope back.

Did you know that deer bite? They do! I never in a million years would have thought that a deer would bite somebody, so I was very surprised when I reached up there to grab that rope and the deer grabbed hold of my wrist.

Now, when a deer bites you, it is not like being bit by a horse where they just bite you and then let go. A deer bites you and shakes its head-almost like a pit bull. They bite HARD and it hurts.

The proper thing to do when a deer bites you is probably to freeze and draw back slowly. I tried screaming and shaking instead. My method was ineffective.

It seems like the deer was biting and shaking for several minutes, but it was likely only several seconds.

I, being smarter than a deer (though you may be questioning that claim by now), tricked it.

While I kept it busy tearing the tendons out of my right arm, I reached up with my left hand and pulled that rope loose. That was when I got my final lesson in deer behavior for the day.

Deer will strike at you with their front feet. They rear right up on their back feet and strike right about head and shoulder level, and their hooves are surprisingly sharp. I learned a long time ago that, when an animal --like a horse -- strikes at you with their hooves and you can't get away easily, the best thing to do is try to make a loud noise and make an aggressive move towards the animal. This will usually cause them to back down a bit so you can escape.

This was not a horse. This was a deer, so obviously, such trickery would not work. In the course of a millisecond, I devised a different strategy. I screamed like a woman and tried to turn and run.

The reason I had always been told NOT to try to turn and run from a horse that paws at you is that there is a good chance that it will hit you in the back of the head. Deer may not be so different from horses after all, besides being twice as strong and 3 times as evil, because the second I turned to run, it hit me right in the back of the head and knocked me down.

Now, when a deer paws at you and knocks you down, it does not immediately leave. I suspect it does not recognize that the danger has passed. What they do instead is paw your back and jump up and down on you while you are laying there crying, like a little girl and covering your head.

I finally managed to crawl under the truck and the deer went away.

So now I know why this story was written by "Anonymous". Seems synonymous with "Dumbass" if you ask me.........

I remember Grandfather telling a story about some cowboys that roped a gray Wollf, but they cheated, there were a bunch of them, and they brought horses to the party...

By the way, Snopes says this story could be true.......
Hope you enjoyed it.
Wollf

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Carcharodon Megalodon

And now for something completely different. I was sorting through a box of my collected minerals and fossils and came upon one of my favorites, a Megalodon tooth that I dug up.....surreptitiously....on the dry lake bed of Edwards Air Force Base in SoCal.....no, you're not s'posed too....but I'm pretty sure the statute has run its course.

Megalodon....what the heck is that? This thing was the true monster of the seas. Estimates of her size have rambled from 50 to 80 feet long....although we'll probably never know, because fishy types don't make good fossils.

But....you can get a feel for what this giganto shark was like by looking at the little bits of eveidence we do have, like placing a modern day Great White into a reconstructed jaw of Megalodon.......


That was one Big, Bad Boy....here's a picture of one of the teeth I have, a pretty impressive artifact.....at least I like it....


That thing swimming around in the ocean would make me think twice about boating, let alone surfing......in fact, just for fun, let's ask some little fellahs whose ancestors were around while Megalodon was cruising....see if their "genetic memory" is working.....

Hey guys......"MEGALODON!!!"


Didn't seem to enjoy that.
Now I feel bad for scaring the little rodents.
No I don't.
Heh
Wollf

Monday, January 12, 2009

Busy Weekend.......

Another little peek through the window of the Lair.....

She-Cub#2 has moved back to SoCal with her Hubby and my two fine Grandwolflets...here's the newest addition, meeting Wollf for the first time.....hory Smokes, it's strange holding a little one again.....

Then, theirs his bigg Sister, who doesn't look so big holding onto the Royal Kitteh Ransom, that Kitteh is getting huge....it was his first time with a little one and he only scratched her about three times......

And then the obligatory, TMI picture of Wollf and "all" his Gurls...not all, because .....well, long time readers know, and oh shi-ite, it's that time of year again....oh well, time goes by and and memories remain to be made...

There.....and, I'll be doing some "real" writing, real soon....

Got some things on my mind, so be forewarned.
Wollf

Friday, January 9, 2009

Training a Dog.....

Isn't as easy as it might seem......

I included this picture because it gave me a smile, just like watching Lil' Wolfie take Uber the wonder Lab for a walk around the neighborhood.....

And by the way, if you have a 10 month old Dog/Puppy, and you decide to train them, remember to train yourself too......don't leave the training materials within the Dogs reach.......

I swear it was easier teaching the Cat to use the toilet than to get this Canine to stop chewing......

Gotta go to work.
Wollf

Thursday, January 8, 2009

I am Not making this up........

Via FOX NEWS .....

A New York doctor who gave his wife a kidney is suing her for $1.5 million — or the return of the vital organ — after he says she cheated on him with a physical therapist.

Richard Batista, 49, is demanding the sum in the middle of a messy divorce with his now-estranged wife, who suffered kidney ailments for years before the transplant.
The Long Island surgeon said he gave the gift of life to his wife in 2001, but things turned sour just two years later while she was recovering from a karate injury, the New York Post reported.

His wife, 44-year-old Dawnell Batista, had an affair with her physical therapist in 2003, he said. She recovered from the knee injury, but he says her low blow has him all out of joint.

"I saved her life and then to be betrayed like this is unfathomable. It's incomprehensible," he told the Post. "She engaged in an extramarital affair and refused to go to marital counseling and reconciliation."

Two years after the affair began she filed for divorce, and Batista accuses her of trying to limit his access to their three children, ages 8, 11 and 14.

"She slapped me with divorce papers in the operating room while I was trying to save another patient's life," he told the Post.

Divorce attorney Dominic Barbara said this case was a first, and that he arranged for a medical expert to determine his client's kidney's worth.

"This has never been done before in the state of New York," Barbara said.

Waaaaah!!! The good Doctor seems a bit bitter about the whole thing.....oops, seems I might have been a little bitter last year myself.

But, Jeebus, Buddy.....take it from me, the Cubs are a whole lot more important than that Tart that you married. You'll do a whole lot better if your Cubs don't see you as the "I want my kidney so she'll DIE" fellow.

In my divorce, we split most everything, including the house. She got the inside, I got the outside.....*drum*.....

Get over it and quit looking like a dummy with a degree...
Wollf

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

The Washington Post......

ANNUAL NEOLOGISM CONTEST......
Once again, The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to its yearly contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common words.

This kind of silliness always makes me smile........

The winners are:

1. Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs.

2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.

3. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

4. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.

5. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent.

6. Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightgown.

7. Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.

8. Gargoyle (n.), olive-flavored mouthwash.

9. Flatulence (n.) emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.

10. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.

11. Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam.

12. Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.

13. Pokemon (n), a Rastafarian proctologist.

14. Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.

15. Frisbeetarianism (n.), (back by popular demand): The belief that, when you die, your Soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.

16. Circumvent (n.), an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.
H/T=Theo

Can you add a few?

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Did I ever tell you........

About how the visit went when I took M'Lady Dragn to meet my Father the Sar'Major? Whoo doggies, that was interesting....but first a little question......

What Nationality is this picture? The answer will be below the story of "Dragn and the Sar'Major"......


He had met her once before when we took the Cubs down to Tombstone for Helldorado days back in October.....it went pretty well, the Sar'Major wasn't feeling all flouncy bouncy, but I think it helped him behave.....

He is well known around Tucson parts as being kinda flamboyant, if you will. Any ways, the second trip, we sat down in the Folkes living room and had a pretty nice conversation, I think the old Man was a bit taken with Dragn.

He popped up, well, as well as an eighty seven year old "pops" up, and proclaimed that,"I got sumpin' for yer Gurl....." and tottered off into the nether regions of his Museum/ House........

We continued conversation with my Momma, who was wondering aloud, "What's that durn fool up to?...."

Well, it wasn't long before we found out. He toddled back into the room, holding high his Gift to Dragn, pride on his face that he's picked just the perfect thing for his Sons New Lady......

A Pink Accordion.

Yup, you read that right, the absolutely most powerful showing of acceptance known to Mankind.

I said, rather softly, so as not to ruin his high demeanor, "Er, umm....an Accordion?"

He brought the instrument down from on high, fixed me with his old Marine Segeant Major gaze of steel and replied, "Well, G-dammit, You told me she was a Polack!"

"All Polacks play the Accordion!"

I looked over at Dragn...........she smiled and said, "It's Beautiful!! I haven't had one since I lost mine in the move..."

I was stunned speechless.

The Sar'Major reveled in his victory...."I Told you Polacks play the Accordion!!"

Well Folkes, it just so happens that Dragn can play "anything", and one better than the other....but an Accordion? So there you have another stereotype proven right. Any of you Polacks out there want to come by, and sit on the Deck and play Polkas.....hey, hit hard and well....sheesh, I hate it when the old Guy is right on about something as weird as this.....

Oh yeah.....remember the question up there?
That there is Definitely Polish.....Wollf shoud know, dontcha think?



Gotcha and your naughty minds.....PG13, remember? H/T= DW
Have a Great Day.
Wollf

I was searching the Web.......

....for information on World War II Snipers, and the evolution of their craft....Ok, so that's a weird subject, I agree, but I came on this photo of some German Soldiers and what looks to be the most bizarre "Bear Ghillie" I've ever seen......

Dude is dressed as a friggin' Polar Bear, fer crissakes. Who thought THAT was a good idea? No wonder they lost the War.

On the other hand, and showing the "softer" side of Sniping, here's a photo of a family of present day Snipers, going on a Sunday stroll, looking for a nice place to lay out their blankets and have a picnic.......

I'm the one carrying the bag of hot dogs up toward the front......

Heh.

Monday, January 5, 2009

Two Thousand Years Ago........



"The budget should be balanced, the Treasury should be refilled, public debt should be reduced, the arrogance of officialdom should be tempered and controlled, and the assistance to foreign lands should be curtailed lest Rome become bankrupt. People must again learn to work, instead of living on public assistance."

Marcus Tullius Cicero - 55 BC

But, of course, "the arrogance of offialdom" was not "tempered and controlled".

Heard of the Roman Empire doing much of anything now a days?
Didn't think so.........
Wollf

Friday, January 2, 2009

Hey Porch Monkeys......

There is a site that I frequent KISP which is known for the denizens of the "Porch"...both Ladies and Gents are welcome there, just sose they behave with a modicum of propriety and decorum.....

What the Headmissy might not know, is that us Gentlemen folk occasional like, leave that esteemed and revered Porch and head out to the "Deck" where we can speak of the things that concern only us'ns who have a deck.

The Lair officially has a Deck.......

G-d, I love these guys.....might just be a little bit of redneck in me, huh?
Wollf

So.....How was Your New Year's Eve????


Mine was spent driving the Dragnlings down to LAX for the 10:00pm flight to Detroit........which would have been fine, except the NWA Representative who sold Dragn the tickets.....who KNEW the ages of the flying Dragnlings....back in August, the day after they had flown the SAME flight, at the SAME time.......

Neglected to say that they would not be allowed on the craft as unaccompanied minors, 16,14,12.......

So, we arrived and were told by the, in my opinion, pompous a$$, behind the ticket counter, that, "It's our policy, and for the safety of the children.....if you know what I mean.....*trails off*"

Yes, I Know what you mean, "Stanley", but I wasn't concerned that "you" would be flying with them......

I do realise that it wasn't this little underachieving d*ckweed's decision to make, and that it truly is NWA's policy that "unaccompanieds" don't fly the last craft out at night, but I am Pi$$ed off at NWA, and from this moment onward I shall *spit* or *f*rt* in their general direction each and every time I hear or invoke their name.

In fact, it may be some time before I can think 100% well of my friends in Washington and Alaska without thinking "Northwest".....*ptuii*.

So, suffice to say that through their erroneous information, we had a lovely two and a half hour drive....ON NEW YEARS EVE, finally got back to the Lair with cranky Dragns running all around.....I'm surprised the Lair wasn't scorched, and then began the movie all over again in the morning......No Rose Parade for us.....

So, here's the lesson of the day....Don't take any salesperson at their word, caveat emptor, I suppose.....I feel better, except for the less than friendly letter that I owe to Corporate.......

Oh!! And.....when the do fly, it costs an extra $100 as unaccompanied, and they don't even get a free friggin' soda!!!

Eff you, Northwest.....*spit*