Monday, June 30, 2008
I have a Dogglet........
His name is Uber Actually, Uber Doggen Snool........snool being that wet spot you find on your pillow in the morning.....ewwww, I know.
Uber came along with my new and last Lady.....he's a champion line Chocko Labrador, showed up in my life at six weeks old.....oh my. He is going to most likely be one of the best Dogs that I have evah been best buddies with.
But, at the same time.......I hate him. Dragn hates him, even the Cubs have their moments.....Nothing. And yes, I mean Nothing, is safe from his extremely sharp little teeth or the things that come out of his furry little a$$......
That being said, there is a list of reasons our Dogs act the way they do....to whit, a reprinting, *I think*, from a year ago or so.......
Ask your dog, if you have a relationship where He'll tell you the truth, what it is about us Hoomans that irritates him,....and he might just answer......"Well....
Blaming your farts on me..... not funny... not funny at all !!!
Yelling at me for barking. I'M A FRIGGIN' DOG, fer Chrissakes.........
Taking me for a walk, then not letting me check stuff out. Exactly whose walk is this anyway?
Any trick that involves balancing food on my nose. Stop it!
Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons. Now you know why we chew your stuff up when you're not home.
The sleight of hand, fake fetch throw. I hate that....... You fooled a dog! Whoooo Hoooooooo what a proud moment for the top of the food chain.
Taking me to the vet for 'the big snip', then acting surprised when I freak out every time we go back!
Getting upset when I sniff the crotches of your guests. Sorry, but I haven't quite mastered that handshake thing yet.
Dog sweaters. Hello ??? Haven't you noticed the fur? Please don't embaass me like that....sheesh.
How you act disgusted when I lick myself. Look, we both know the truth. You're just jealous. You can't do it, I can.....get over it.
Now lay off me on some of these things. We both know who's boss here! You don't see me picking up your poop do you?"
Oh, and by the way......is Uber not the cutest lil' Doglet you evah saw, or what?
Wollf is a happy Man.....just.....plain.....friggin' Happy.
Got what I need in Life...still have a ways to go on the personal Journey, but a Woman of Repute that Loves me, and......a DOG......and three of the finest Cubs evah made..........