With Uber Dog and Ransom Kitteh.....H/T to everyone on the net that has written their version of this....
1. Gather presents, boxes, paper, scissors, tape, etc. in middle of living room floor.
2. Get tape back from Kitteh.
3. Remove scissors from Dog's mouth.
4. Open box.
5. Take Kitteh out of box.
6. Remove tape from Dog's mouth.
7. Take scissors away from Kitteh.
8. Put present in box.
9. Remove present from Kitteh's mouth.
10. Put back in box after removing Kitteh from box.
11. Take scissors from Dog and sit on them.
12. Remove Kitteh from box and put on lid.
13. Take tape away from Dog.
14. Unroll paper.
15. Take Kitteh OFF box.
16. Cut paper being careful not to cut Kitteh's foot or nose that is getting in the way as he "helps."
17. Let Kitteh and Dog tear remaining paper.
18. Take Kitteh off box.
19. Wrap paper around box.
20. Remove Kitteh from box & take wrapping paper from Dog's mouth.
21. Tell Dog to fetch the tape so he will stop stealing it.
22. Take scissors away from Kitteh.
23. Take tape Dog is holding....after chasing him down.
24. Quickly tape one spot before taking scissors from Dog & sitting on them again.
25. Fend off Kitteh trying to steal tape & tape another spot. Take bow from Dog.
27. Go get roll of wrapping paper Kitteh ran off with.
28. Take scissors from Dog who took them when you got up and ran down the stairs.
29. Give pen to Dog to hold so he stops licking your face.....then realise mistake and chase him down the stairs, retrieve pen.......
30. Remove Kitteh from present & hurriedly slap tape on to hold the paper on.
31. Take now soggy bow from Dog & tape on since the sticky stuff no longer sticks.
32. Take pen from Dog who stole it again, address tag & affix while Kitteh tries to eat pen.
33. Grab present before Kitteh opens it & put it away.
34. Clean up mess Kitteh and Dog made playing tug-of-war with remnants of wrapping paper.
35. Put away rest of wrapping supplies & tell Kitteh and Dog what good helpers they are.
Put present away so Kitteh and Dog don't get it....promptly forget where I hid it........Open Beer.
Drink.
Repeat.
Wish Dragn was here
*note to self....buy more gift bags....write down where I hide things.....don't lose note telling me where I hide things......*
Dammit, where'd I put that note?
Wollf
PS: Rose.....I already checked in the refridgerator behind the milk.
Sheesh
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5 comments:
ROFLOL!!!! now thats what i call some good sweet holiday fun! lol, yeash makes my wrapping nights w/ emily seem boring, lol ... and last yrs involved egg nog and rum (for me... she seemed to think wrapping gifts and drunkiness didndt mix too weel)
merry christmas wolfie!
oh hey, did u chk under the sink in da kitchen???? thats a good hiding place, maybe thats where note went. lol :)
Wollf - it is ALWAYS behind the milk! Or the couch, or the water bottle on the counter or....
back of the closet behind the ammo and 30.06...i think.
threaten animals with 30.06 for 10 minutes, then remember that they don't speak English very good, on average half the vocabulary of 80% of undocumented workers.
i've already *checked* the usual spots with no luck.... i thinks my Wollf did too good of a job this time around..... not behind the milk carton or beer, not under the sink, checked the laundry basket and linen closet, the couch is busted [funny story on that] so it's not under there, took apart *his* side of the garage, and even crawled under the boyz' beds.... hmmmm, where could it be??? gosh dang it..... even went is far as to look in the sock drawer........ if I were Wollf where would I have put it? scratch that; it's no wonder i can't find it, and no wonder he doesn't remember... maybe Wollf needs a patch in his stocking this year!
I know you checked the laundry basket, Dragn, but did you look in his back pocket? I've noticed that that's where the wrench (or tape measure or screwdriver or flashlight that was "right here a minute ago") sometimes is when my husband is searching all over for it... LOL!
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