Moonrise

Monday, October 11, 2010

Via the E-Mails......

Grammar rules to keep in mind

Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.

And don’t start a sentence with a conjunction.

It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.

Avoid clichés like the plague. (They’re old hat)

Also, always avoid annoying alliteration.

Be more or less specific.

Remarks in brackets (however relevant) are (usually) (but not always) unnecessary.

Also too, never, ever use repetitive redundancies.

No sentence fragments.

Contractions aren’t necessary and shouldn’t be used.

Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.

Do not be redundant; do not use more words than necessary; it’s highly superfluous.

One should NEVER generalize.

Comparisons are as bad as clichés.

Don’t use no double negatives.

Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.

One-word sentences? Eliminate.

Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.

The passive voice is to be ignored.

Eliminate commas, that are, not necessary. Parenthetical words however should be
enclosed in commas.

Never use a big word when a diminutive one would suffice.

Kill all exclamation points!!!

Use words correctly, irregardless of how others use them.

Understatement is always the absolute best way to put forth earth shaking ideas.

Use the apostrophe in it’s proper place and omit it when its not needed.

Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “I hate quotations. Tell me what you know.”

If you’ve heard it once, you’ve heard it a thousand times: Resist hyperbole; not one writer in a million can use it correctly.

Puns are for children, not groan readers.

Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.

Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.

Who needs rhetorical questions?

Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.
Thanks!
Wollf

5 comments:

Rambling Rose said...

But would't you agree that part of the fun of writing is ignoring all these rules?

Rambling Rose said...

But would't you agree that part of the fun of writing is ignoring all these rules?

aA said...

Eye alwayz tri two spel tings rite, to.

There are better posts somewhere in the world, but I don't know of 'em!

Grate stuf hear, Wollf!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

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Lawman said...

Well shucks. It appears I ain't got no good English after all.

Recon it's a good thang I speak this here "Redneck" talkin' instead O' that thar "Eng-a-lish" thang them city folks is a yammerin' about. :)